Hey mama. Do you ever feel like you tell your kids the same thing 1,000 times a day? No? It's just me? Ha! It's truly one of the most frustrating things of motherhood. "How many times have I told you to pick up your clothes?" "You don't have to be told to fix your bed. You know you're supposed to do that every morning!" "Would you stop teasing your sister?!?" Can't you just feel the tension rising? I feel a need for chocolate just typing those phrases out. Ha! I don't need to tell you this isn't God's plan for motherhood. But you also need to know that there is no need to drown in condemnation and exasperation. That is also not God's plan for you, and He always provides a way of escape for His children. He has a name for this escape plan: faithfulness. We live in such an instant society, that we have slowly come to expect our child training to be instant as well. But cultivating and training little hearts is the process of years, not days or weeks. You're going to be reminding your kids to pick their clothes up a little while longer. I've just gotta tell you that. And that's ok. Should you require obedience from your kids? Absolutely! Should that obedience be run by anger or fear? Definitely not. So, where do we begin to apply this faithfulness? In our own hearts! If you struggle with frustration and anger when your kids disobey, it's time to set up some guards in your own life. What exactly are we supposed to be faithful in doing? Many of us are quite faithful in yelling at our kids when things don't go as planned. But deep in our hearts, past the frustration, we want to be faithful in showing the love and grace of Jesus. So, let's break it down.
I used to think that, because I'm a Christian, I need to be able to respond with grace in an instant, without any guidelines. This was a half-truth that caused a lot of condemnation in my heart. While my goal is to never respond in anger to my children, I have found that when I apologize for my sin against them, it does a beautiful thing in their hearts, and gives them a front-row seat to Biblical repentance. However, just because you blew it doesn't mean your child should get off without consequences. We have to circle around to faithfulness. We as moms need to faithfully practice giving grace, but we must also faithfully teach our children that their actions always bring about consequences, both good and bad. This is one of the God-given tasks of parenting, and cannot be neglected. Decide how to make these steps fit your home, and then follow through faithfully. Over and over, day in, day out, a dozen times in the morning, if need be. This is where faithful motherhood turns into peaceful motherhood. The choices we make in parenting will always have consequences. If we chose to neglect teaching our children about right and wrong consequences, we will reap our own set of consequences as we try to parent, especially as they grow older. Let me encourage you with some truth, before you go. These words are for you, personally. God sees you, mama. He knows you, and He knows your heart. He cares about the way you parent and He loves your kids deeply. He chose you to be their Mom for a purpose. Your mothering matters to the Kingdom. You are a warrior in God's army, and you're doing Kingdom work. Be faithful in what you do. It will be rewarded. "So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up." (Galatians 6:9 NLT)
3 Comments
7/15/2020 09:12:57 am
I love this reminder to circle our hearts back to faithfulness—to not grow weary. Thanks Stefani!
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I love the way you address this issue! I also love how you talk about the importance of apologizing. I recently listened to a podcast about which factors influence a child's likelihood to continue in faith into adulthood. One of the big factors was a parent's ability to confess when he/she failed and to apologize. It's so comforting to know we don't have to be perfect, and that our confession and asking for forgiveness can actually grow our children's faith.
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